Is it worth it?

At the beginning of this school year, I had to move away from my school, as I was moving to a different country. I was really upset because my best friend (who is a girl) and I would be apart. A few months before I left, I started having feelings for my friend, but I never did or said anything about this to her, or to any of her friends. I think a few of my friends figured it out, but none of them actually said anything, because they knew what a tough time I was going through. Since I moved away, my best friend and I have kept in touch with each other, calling each other, sending emails, having chat messages, etc. For these coming summer holidays, I am going to spend the entire time in Michigan (where I used to live). I couldn't be happier because it means I get to meet my friend, but I still have feelings for her, and I don't know what to do about them anymore. Please help me by giving me any advice that you can! Should I tell her what I feel? Should I keep it secret? How will she react? Is it worth it if I am only going for a few months? PLEASE HELP ME!!

Sean, 15, Cambodia

Hello Sean,

Wow, it sounds like you and this girl go way back! I don't think it is worth it for you to ask her out or anything like that because you are only going to see her for a few months, and then it will become a long distance relationship, granted she says yes to you. If she doesn't say yes, then your friendship could become weird and awkward, and the little time you do have together will be spent in weird situations. If you really want it to work with her, then ask her what she thinks about a long distance relationship. If she doesn't mind it, then you can ask her, and hope that she says yes. another thing to note is whether she already likes someone, or has a boyfriend. If she does already have a boyfriend, then as her best friend, you should be happy for her, and not want to ruin her relationship with that person. Overall, I think it is best if you don't ask her out, or tell her about your feelings. Good luck in whatever decision you make.

Lots of love

Your Agony Aunt.

XX

I've been seriously crushing on this girl at school...

This is my problem - for almost a whole year I've been seriously crushing on this girl at school. The thing is she absolutely detests me! We have nothing in common except for the fact that were both good students and that people make fun of us for absolutely nothing! What do I do to get her to like me? Or is it like my friends say? Is it hopeless? I know the guy she likes and he's a complete jerk! I feel like I die when I even think of the possibility of them being together.

Anonymous

Hello.

You definatley have a huge crush on this girl, however it seems pretty obvious that she doesn't like you back. You can always try to ask her out, and see what she replies. If she says yes, then alls well and good. If she says no, then it means she doesn't like you back. It may sting to get such a reply from someone you really like, but it will definatley help you as it stops you from wasting time thinking about her, and allows you to think about some of the other girls that you could be in a relationship with. Good luck, and I hope she likes you back!

Lots of love

Your Agony Aunt.

XX

Am I losing too much weight?

A few weeks ago I noticed I had lost at least 2kg and that is ALOT for me, I haven't lost/gained mush weight for a year or so. Also, I have been eating a tonne more than usual, it hasn't been the right stuff either (being that my mum never has healthy food in the house) I have tried chewing gum/distracting myself but I still keep eating and eating (might not seem like a lot to some people but it is a heap for me) It really scares me that something may be wrong..

Emily, 15, Australia.

Hello Emily.

Well, your problem might be a little out of my league, as I am not a certified doctor, and I am not sure what your usual body mass is. If you are a very sporty person, then it is possible that you are losing calories because you are playing a lot more sports. However, if you are losing 2 kg's, and are worried, then you shouldn't stop eating the types of food your normally do it. It sounds like you have realised that you eat a lot, and in the past few weeks you have tried to stop yourself from eating as much as you usually do. This probably led to you losing the weight. If your diet is changing in any way, your eating more fruits and veggies, your eating more unhealthy food, anything, make sure that you are still getting all your daily requirements of fats, carbohydrates, proteins, etc. If this continues to persist, then you need to consult a doctor, as losing too much weight can in fact become dangerous for your body.

If you are a sporty person, then constantly eating food could be your body's way of saying that it requires more energy than you are currently giving it through your "diet". Try to get your mom to lock up all the unhealthy foods into a store, or even stop buying them. This might help you stop eating the food as you no longer have access to it. Ask your mom to buy some healthy foods, like fruits, and whenever you have a compulsion to eat, just grab a fruit and munch away.

Lots of Love,

Your Agony Aunt

XX

He acts like he likes me...

Hey Aunt Agony..

 I have a HUGE crush on a guy whom I think has a crush on me as well. I don't know whether I have to propose him, because I'm so scared. I keep thinking about him, and also dirty stuff in my mind. Am I the only person who thinks like this? PLEASE help me.
 
He's very very popular, and good in studies too, like me :P. He looks at me, stares, and also asks me for notebooks for him to copy.

I'm so in love with this guy, I think the WORLD of him. Help me whether I should propose him, or anything else. Thank you!

Catty, 14, Qatar.

Hello Catty,

It seems to me that this boy does like you, but he probably isn't sure if you like him back. Try and make the first move, show him you are interested, try to communicate or talk with him. The next time he asks to borrow your notes get them out of your bag slowly, and ask him a few questions to get to know him better. You are not the only person who thinks about someone else with dirty thoughts, but you should probably watch out and make sure you don't get to distracted by him, or your grades in school will start to drop. If you have some of the same interests as him, like sports, or a certain subject, then talk to him about those things. By communicating, it will show you are interesting, and he should eventually ask you out. Good luck!


Lots of love, your Agony Aunt
XX

Does he like me as well?

Ok. So theres this guy. I really like him and hes on the track team with me. Hes in 8th grade and im in 7th. I want to talk to him but hes always around his friends and you wouldnt just walk up to a person and be like "hi" and then run away right? Well I dont want to do that. Hes really popular and i cheer him on all the time at meets. I think i really really like him. Hes going to high school next year and i dont want to regret not saying anything to him before he leaves. Im a very outgoing person and im friendly but im too scared to do anything to make him notice me. Can you please help me?

**My friend Michelle things he likes me. He looks at me alot and it always looks like he wants to tell me something or say hey or something like that. I dont want him to find out that he likes me and ruin a friendship that we never had. Or even got the chance to have. Theres only two and a half more weeks of school and im planning to make a move. Like get his number or something. I really hope you can help me! Thanks sooo much!**

**
Anonymous

Hello,

If you really like this guy, try to have a conversation with him. This is the most vital step so that you can see if you two are compatible when talking. If he has an email adress, facebook, msn chat, or even a mobile, casually drop a message either telling him he did a really good job in a run, asking him what time you are supposed to meet for your next run, or something else related to your track team. Also ask him a question like "what are you upto?" or "How you doing?". Carry on the conversation from there. If your friend Michelle is right about him liking you, then the sign of you trying to communicate him will give him a chance to come up to you, and talk to you. From what you wrote, it sounds like he is interested in you as well, he just doesn't know how to express his feelings and isn't sure if you like him back. Make the first move, communicate with him, and hopefully he will reciprocate, and respond. Good luck!


Lots of love, your Agony Aunt
XX

She's changed in a bad way...

Well, I have this friend, well, kind of a friend, who I have been really close to for awhile. I've known her for about two years, and she's really funny, but lately she's become really mean, and is making fun of people, even me, and my other close friend. Is there anything that I should do about this. Should I just stop being friends with her, confront her about the problem, what? But this has also happened before, and I confronted her about it, and she admitted to being mean, but with out a reason. Now, just out of nowhere, she's been making fun of my cloths, my accent, my family, who I am, what I do.

Lianna, 11, United States of America

Hello Lianna.

I think the best thing to do in your situation is have a convention with her, and ask her why she is doing what she is doing. Maybe she doesn't realise how mean she is being, or that she is about to loose valuable friends over it. Perhaps she is having some problems at home, and the only way she can deal with them is by becoming a hardcore person who doesn't have any feelings. If she doesn't listen to you, or take into account what you say, then tell her that you no longer want to be her friend. Either she will realise the mistakes she is making, and hopefully she will change and ask you to forgive her, or she won't realise her mistakes, continue to be mean to everyone, and it will be a good thing that you are no longer associated with her. Confront her first, try and figure out the problem, and if all else fails, start fading her out. Good luck!

Lots of love, your Agony Aunt
XX

Sleeping Problems

Well my problem is about sleeping. Either I can't go to sleep at all, or I can only manage to sleep for an hour or so every night. I don't know what to do. I haven't slept properly, and I am always tired in school. I have tried to count "jumping sheep" and all that, but none of it works for me. Do you have any suggestions?

Ginger Famallion, 17, Brazil.

Hello Ginger. Sleeping, sometimes known as Insomnia, is definitely a big problem, especially if you are going to school and need to concentrate. If you have tried to count numbers, read, or relax before you go to sleep, then these might not work because you need to already be tired before they can take any effect. Try to do a little exercise, like swimming, cycling, or even walking before you get into bed. If this doesn't work, try to make your bedtime later. Before you go to sleep, try to scoff down some banana's, tuna, or some warm tasty milk. These tend to turn your body into a calmer mood, and hopefully let you sleep faster. Hope this helps. If not, then you should consult a doctor for further information.

I'm worried about my friend

Hi Agony Aunt...
I have a little problem..My friend has been talking to this boy online, and they have decided to meet each other next week at a cafe. I don\'t know a lot about him, and am worried about him. He claims to be seventeen years old, and really popular in his school, or something like that, but he has never given my friend more information than that about him. I am worried about her, and don\'t think she should meet this boy. What should I do?

Cathy Street, 16, England.

Hello Cathy. I understand your dilemma, and agree with you that your friend shouldn't meet this online friend, and definitely not alone. You should find out more information about him, like what school he goes to (and then confirm that he goes to that school), as well as trying to find out some other information about him, like the type of personality he has, or the type of people he hangs out with, and how old he is. You need to voice your concerns to your friend, and if she refuses to find out anymore information, or if he refuses to tell her anything more, and your friend still wants to meet him, then you should tell your parents what's is going on, or even go straight to her parents. She may be angry at you for a while, but you could potentially be saving her life. Good luck.

Boy Problems...

I have a huge crush on this guy friend I have. We are really close, and you can say that we flirt a lot. The thing is, I\'m not sure how he feels about me. Does he like me in the same way, or does he think I am a complete idiot? I really wish he would notice me as more than just a friend. How can I find out what he feels about me, because we text each other a lot, and hang out a lot, but in school we hardly ever see each other coz we are in different classes. Any ideas? I really want to know, coz I spend a lot of time just thinking about him. Thanks!

Trudy Canovhan, 15, America

Hello Trudy. This is a rather tricky situation, you two sound pretty close, and I am guessing you don't want him to find out that you like him and ruin your friendship with him, that is if he doesn't have the same feelings back to you. Try and find out who he likes, either ask him directly, or do it through the more subtle approach of getting one of your close friends, who is also friends with him, to find out who he likes. You could also accidently tell one of your friends that you like him, and hopefully they will get the word out, and he will hear about it. I hope you manage to find a solution to your problem soon!

XX

Agony Aunt

Welcome to the Blog!

Hey everyone! Welcome to the blog! I am here to help you out wherever possible. If you have a problem, any type of problem, then send your question to me, and I will reply to you as soon as possible. I do hope that I can help some of you out there, and that the advice I give will be useful to not only the asker, but to other people as well.